Title: Red Dress
Author/Artist: CryptJo

Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Crossdressing, yaoi, bad language
Pairing(s): Sanzo x Hazel
Summary: Hazel tries a new tactic to get his man.
Notes: Not betaed, so feel free to point out any errors. 

It was the end of a long and crappy day.  All Sanzo wanted to do was drink, smoke then go to bed.  He had managed to shrug off his companions, dumped his robes in his room and found a bar a few streets away from their inn, where he hoped to have a few quiet, anonymous drinks.  He hoisted himself onto the barstool and ordered a shot which he knocked back whilst waiting for his beer to be poured.

Silence at last.  It didn't matter that the bar was full of patrons as long as he was away from the others, he was as close to content as he could get.  They had finally managed to get away from that lunatic bishop and his creepy sidekick and Sanzo planned to celebrate that in his own way; with a beer in one hand, a cigarette in the other and a newspaper spread out before him.

Three drinks in and his peace was momentarily disturbed by a woman squeezing herself onto the stool beside him.  Her perfume tickled his nose and the sequins on her red dress sparkled at the edge of his field of vision.  Luckily, she seemed to settle down quickly and quietly sipped her wine, allowing Sanzo to return to his reading.  For a short time.

"Excuse me, sir," the woman interrupted his reading with a light yet surprisingly pleasant tone.  She gestured to her now empty glass.  "Buy a lady a drink?"

Perfect.  Just what he needed; the type of girl who, rather than demurely wait for a man to bestow some attention upon her, chose to be the one to make the first move.  He should have guessed.  The type of woman who wore a dress like that was the type of woman that Gojyo went for, not that Sanzo had an interest in any type of woman; it was just that he disliked this kind in particular.

Without looking up from his newspaper, Sanzo grunted in response.

"Sorry lady, you're barking up the wrong tree.  Ply your trade elsewhere."

Rude and blunt.  That was the best way to get his message across and if he hurt a few feelings in the process, well that couldn't be helped.

"I'm shocked, sir!" the woman replied with what sounded like insincere indignation.  "Ply my trade indeed.  I've never been so insulted."

"I'm sure you have."

"To make it up to me," she continued, ignoring Sanzo's barb, "I'll let you buy me a drink."

He'd had enough.  Clearly, subtlety didn't work, so he looked up from his paper, shot her a glare and tried again.

"In case you missed it the first time, I'll say it again.  Not interested."

"Are you sure, Sanzo?"

He was just about to demand to know how this woman knew his name when something stopped him.  Looking closer, there was something distinctly odd about her; the voice didn't sound quite right, the chin was a little too square and showed a faint hint of stubble and when she pushed her hair away from her face, she looked very familiar.  Not unlike a certain bishop who seemed to plague his existence.

It was with a great deal of trepidation that Sanzo asked the woman a question.

"Hazel?"

"Surprise!" 

The woman - Hazel - grinned at Sanzo, showing white teeth between ruby red lips.  Unbelievable.  Sanzo signalled the barman to give him another shot.

"Don't forget my wine."

"Get your own wine, you freak."

"You're always so inhospitable.  You need to relax and loosen up."

"Dress like a girl, you mean?"

Sanzo heard the soft rustle of fabric as Hazel leaned closer, placing a hand on his thigh.

"You practically do already," he spoke softly, allowing his breath to wash over Sanzo's cheek.  "Maybe you should be the man?"

Too busy puzzling over what exactly Hazel had meant by his last comment, Sanzo failed to act upon the hand slowly making its way up his leg.  It was only when fingertips grazed the softness between his legs that he jumped into action.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he hissed, grabbing Hazel's hand and squeezing.

"You wouldn't hit a woman, would you?" Hazel tittered.

"You're not a woman."

"That's what makes this perfect."

Despite the death grip Sanzo had on his hand, Hazel shifted even closer to the monk, angling his body so his groin came directly into contact with Sanzo's knee.

"What are you talking about?"

Fluttering his eyelashes, Hazel giggled lightly and rocked against Sanzo's leg.

"Well, I don't imagine you'd fuck women..."

The implication hung in the air.  Hazel continued to rub his groin against Sanzo, not-so-subtly demonstrating what he wanted.  Through the denim of his jeans, Sanzo could feel an unmistakable hardness.  Hazel's wanton behaviour was beginning to have an effect on him.  As if sensing Sanzo's hesitation, Hazel leaned forward once more and whispered that he had a room upstairs from the bar if Sanzo wished to find out what he wore under his dress.  Once the offer was made, he turned and sauntered towards the door that led out of the bar, leaving Sanzo to his drink.

"Damn him."

Another drink found its way into Sanzo's possession and he knocked it back with a grimace.  Surely it was the liquor which caused the heat in his belly; it couldn't be Hazel's offer.  Right?  The man was nothing more than yet another thorn in Sanzo's side so why on earth would he sit there, running his hand over his knee, remembering how Hazel's erection felt when it rubbed against him?  Why, indeed?

"Damn him," he bit out again.  "What the hell did he mean by 'be the man' anyway?"

There was only one way to find out.  Telling himself that the only reason he was even considering going up to Hazel's room was to confront him about his comment, Sanzo made his way out of the bar and up the stairs.  At the top, he looked around; he was faced with four doors and no idea which room belonged to Hazel.  Trusting luck, he strode up to the first door and raised his fist to knock.

"I wouldn't knock on that door, Sanzo," a playful voice called from an open doorway.  "I heard some rather unsavoury noises coming from that room earlier.  I doubt they'd appreciate the interruption."

Hazel stepped back to allow Sanzo entry to his room, smiling pleasantly.  He curtseyed before closing and locking the door.

"Take that dress off, you look ridiculous."

"Wanting me naked already?  Without even a kiss first?" Hazel chuckled and walked over to the bed to sit primly on the edge.  "And I thought you were a gentleman."

As was usual for him when he didn't know what to say, Sanzo snorted.  Hazel patted the bed beside him and for no other reason than he wanted to sit down, Sanzo joined him.  It was a mistake; as soon as he settled onto the soft mattress, Hazel draped himself over Sanzo, shifting to sit on his lap and throwing his arms around the monk's shoulders.

"Do you know how long I've waited to get you into my bed?"

"We're not in bed."

"Details, my good man.  Mere details," wriggling around, Hazel made himself comfortable and rested his head on Sanzo's shoulder.  "I'm sure it won't be too long

before we're snuggling under the covers like two newly weds."

"I don't snuggle."

"But you didn't say no to us being in bed together."

Sanzo could have kicked himself for falling into that trap.  He had absolutely no intentions of getting into bed with this crazed clergyman, even if he was currently allowing the man to plant small kisses over his cheeks.  Even as Sanzo's lips parted to allow Hazel's tongue to dart inside, he told himself that at any moment, he would push the man off his lap, stand up and walk out of the room.

Despite all the promises he made to himself, Sanzo found that kissing Hazel was not an entirely unpleasant experience.  Nor did it feel bad to run his hands down over silk to cup and squeeze Hazel's buttocks and it felt positively wonderful when Hazel responded to his groping by grinding down against his awakening erection.  It wasn't enough, though, and so Sanzo flipped them.  Now Hazel was underneath Sanzo and entirely at his mercy.  One hand remained on Hazel's backside, trapped under Hazel's body, still squeezing and kneading soft flesh; the other stole upwards and fingers tangled in silvery hair.

"Would you still like me to remove my dress?"

After a moment's consideration, Sanzo shook his head.

"No.  Leave it on."

Even as he spoke, Sanzo's hand stroked from Hazel's neck, down the sequinned bodice of the dress, gliding over the smooth planes of the man's chest and stomach until it reached the hardness at his groin.

"Ah yes," a pleasured hiss escaped Hazel's lips.  "Touch me please, Sanzo."

"Shut up."

Ignoring the pout from the man under him, Sanzo curled his fingers around Hazel's erection, pulling the fabric tight over the tip so traces of pre-come seeped through.  Hazel shivered under the touch and whimpered, encouraging Sanzo to grip harder and move his hand in shallow strokes. 

Hazel's lips moved as if speaking, but no sound came out.  Sanzo wondered if the man was wordlessly begging; the idea of that appealed to him.  It gave Sanzo a sense of power which almost allowed him to forgive the fact that Hazel was usually so annoying.  Almost...until the man spoke again.

"If I'd known it would be this easy, I'd have seduced you sooner."

Sanzo's hand stilled.  Seduced?  Had he been seduced?  Now that he thought about it, he wondered when his intention to confront the bishop had turned into an intention to screw him.  Disgusted with himself, he pushed away from the man on the bed and stood to leave.

"What's wrong?"

"This...you..." Sanzo couldn't think straight.  He detested this man, the one he had been kissing and caressing moments previously, but he couldn't deny how turned on he was.  He glanced at Hazel; he wore an innocent expression as though he was genuinely confused by this turn of events.

"Is it the dress?" Hazel grasped the hem and pulled it upwards, showing his smooth, muscular legs.  "Does it make you feel confused?"

"It's not the damned dress!"

The dress didn't help though, even if Sanzo was unable to actually admit that.  The very fact that Hazel was dressed as a woman made the whole situation appear even more sordid than it was and with every inch that the dress was raised, his resolve wavered.

"So, you wanna see what's under my dress?"

The repeated offer brought Sanzo back to reality.

"Fuck it."

His mind made up, Sanzo gave into temptation.  In a flash, he was back on the bed, pinning Hazel's wrists above his head with one hand and with the other, tore the dress.  Sanzo shook his hand free of loose threads and popped the stud of his jeans and yanked down the zip.

"See - I told you that you could be the man," Hazel gave Sanzo a cheeky wink.  

Sanzo silenced Hazel with a kiss.  Nothing gentle, but a hard, bruising kiss designed to shut the man up more than anything else.  Tongues and teeth clashed as Sanzo pushed his jeans down as far as he could then settled between Hazel's legs.

"This is how it's going to be," he said, pulling back from the kiss.  "You're going to shut up, I'm going to fuck you and when we're both done, I'm going to leave and we're never going to talk about this.  Ever.  Got that?"

"Got it!  Just one thing…"

"What?"

"I knew you couldn't resist, so I'm all ready for you."

"Shut the fuck up before I gag you with your dress."

Without bothering to be gentle, Sanzo slipped his free hand under Hazel's ass and pressed a finger to the man's hole.  Sure enough, the digit slipped in easily proving that Hazel was indeed ready for him.  In Sanzo's mind, this was a perfect development; the less time he had to spend preparing Hazel the better.  All he wanted to do was fuck the man and have done with it, so he positioned himself at Hazel's entrance and drove forward, burying himself within the tight heat.  He gave the man no time to adjust, wanting to get it over with as quickly as possible.  He was horny and hard but he still felt a certain degree of disgust with himself.

Underneath him, Hazel arched and writhed, rubbing himself desperately against Sanzo's stomach.  Eventually, Sanzo took pity upon him and freed his hands.

"Get yourself off."

Needing no further encouragement, Hazel reached between their bodies and fisted his erection.  Despite their intimacy, each moved separately, driving themselves to climax.  Sanzo refused to have it any other way.  There was no attraction here; it was just the physical fulfilment of orgasm that he looked for.  He considered flipping Hazel over so he wouldn't have to look into the face of this man that he disliked so much but left things as they were.  It truly was hypocrisy to think of hating someone whilst screwing them into the mattress, but that was Sanzo through and through.

Hatred or not, even he had to admit that fucking Hazel was more than enjoyable.  It had been far too long since he'd last indulged himself like this and so his climax wasn't long in coming.  As soon as he felt the first tingling that came with release, he pulled out.  Hazel looked up at him in confusion but Sanzo ignored him and wrapped his hand around his erection to stroke himself to climax.  His seed splattered on what remained of the red dress, staining the already ruined fabric.  He wiped his hand on the cover and rolled over to pull up his jeans and fasten them, watching as the puddle he'd made was added to by Hazel's own release.

"My poor dress."

"Fuck your dress."

"You kinda did, Sanzo."

"Whatever."

The end.

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