Author: Aeneus (http://aeneus.livejournal.com/)
Summary: When all is lost already,
what do you fight for?
Disclaimer: Minekura's, not mine. Just playing ;)
Note: This ficlet was originally written for the random song-request meme on my LJ. Feait requested Sanzo/Hakkai and randomly selected the song "Blue" by Angie Hart. Beta by car_jack <3
Sanzo shivered and pulled the robe tighter around himself. The minimal warmth from his cigarette wasn't enough to combat the deep chill of the night. He took another drag and watched the tip flare up in dismal defiance, only to fade again a second later.
Sanzo shrugged, not in the mood to confirm the obvious. At least it wasn't Gojyo or Goku who had woken up and decided to annoy him. Hakkai quietly sat down next to him. He wrapped his arms over his knees and looked up at the full moon above them. Sanzo continued smoking his cigarette until it burned his fingertips. He flicked the butt away, watching it disappear in the long grass, the pleasure it had brought already in the past.
"It does all feel rather futile sometimes, doesn't it?"
Sanzo looked sharply at Hakkai. For all his masks, Hakkai had an ability for frankness that was deadlier than any of their weapons.
"We've already lost what we should have fought for."
Hakkai was still looking up at the moon. Sanzo resisted the urge to follow his gaze. He already knew well enough the judgement that lay there in the sky.
"I fight only for myself," Sanzo said, angered by Hakkai's exposure of his private thoughts – his private weakness.
Hakkai finally turned to him. He looked like he was about to say something, but didn't. Sanzo almost wished he had said something, something Sanzo could have responded to. Because the look Hakkai gave him instead cut right through him and left him paralysed.
Hakkai leaned towards him, put his hand on Sanzo's arm and kissed him softly on the cheek. When he pulled back, his eyes were filled with sadness and Sanzo had to turn away.
Hakkai got up. "I'll leave you then…"
Sanzo stayed still, listening to Hakkai's footsteps as they faded away, back towards the campsite - every step another chance for him to speak up, to ask Hakkai to stay.
At last, it was silent. Sanzo sighed, his body trembling as the cold seemed to suddenly intensify. He pulled further into himself and lit another cigarette. The flame of his lighter shone bright and quick, transferring its energy to the stick and leaving it smouldering in the night.